Somebody somewhere loves you more than anyone else anywhere.
I know, I know. We live in perilous times. It bothers me, too. I get depressed; quiet, withdrawn, sullen, fearful, doubtful – all that stuff. I look out across the west to see a beautiful sunset, and all I can think about is Klaus Schwab, the injections, Satan wants his throne, Putin, Biden, lies, war, division. It never ends.
Since publishing my podcast on my experience with the “alien”, my subsequent conversion to follow Yahuah and my year-long sabbatical and immersion in the Word, I have noticed that my brothers in the Way seem to have turned their backs on me. Silence. Alienation. Solitude.
It is my life, and what did I expect? Did I expect any one of them to come to me and inquire about it? Did I expect any one of them to believe me, or that any one of them would accept me after knowing my past?
Either I lied and made it all up just so my “friends” can have an excuse to turn away from me as I publicly humiliate myself, or I cared enough about serving my Father that I tell the Truth regardless of the cost to me personally. It is the event that turned me from my sin, that brought me finally to fully face Him and follow Him. He showed me what He has shown no one else on earth. I am unique in all the world, I know, and must tell the Truth.
Wait until they are standing in front of CNN’s news cameras. Just wait and see.
Yahuah saved me. His power and His wisdom opened my heart to see deep into Truth. I will always proclaim His love for me, and never hide from what He has done. I, too, had to be brought to heel. I had to be forcefully shown that Hell was waiting with bared fangs. I had to die. I came to my end that night, and He did it.
He gives me the strength to tell the world. He chose me, and here I am.
I have paid a price for my relationship with the Truth. It is worth it. I would pay any price to have a relationship with my Father. It’s hard sometimes, calling Him “Father”, because the walk is painful, and sometimes I do not feel close to Him. I wander to the side of the Way. I sit down on the path and rub the sore places of my soul.
Solomon said that there was only one faithful man in 1000, and no faithful women. You can look it up. Looking things up is a good exercise in seeking Truth. My objective is to be that faithful man. Faithful to my Father, faithful to my Brother. Faithful to my Friend.
I will remain faithful to the end. When the bullet is leaving the chamber and rushing excitedly to my heart, I will be praising Yahuah. No power, no isolation, no rejection by man can stand between me and my Salvation.
It is Yahuah who loves me. He knows the path that I have struggled along for so many years. He has washed away the buckets of tears, the heart made soft as mink from decades of grieving over the lack of compassion people have for one another. The hatred, the lies, the abuse.
Better to live alone in a barn than in a fine home with a contentions wife. We are called to peace.
What I love about pain and despair is how sharply it points to Truth. The darkness of sorrow contrasts with the glory of Heaven. Yahuah offers glory upon glory to those who follow Him. He keenly desires that we seek every good gift, every reward. It pleases Him. He rejoices when we embrace the good He pours out upon the souls of His people.
When we hurt, He hurts with us. When we lift our faces to Him, He directs His eyes upon us. He wants to know: “Will you believe Me?” Will you throw that cross upon your savaged back? Will you carry it until you collapse from the burden of it? When you face is ground into the bloody dirt, will you continue to walk in the Way? Will you hold fast to His Truth, regardless of the cost? What about when your most loved friends turn away? What about when your children despise you, or your spouse mocks you? When your most precious deny Yahusha and spit on your face?
Will you stand? Will Yahuah still be your God? Will you blame Him for your loss? Job maintained his faith after his seven children were killed in a single moment, a moment authorized by His God, my Yahuah. Yahuah hurt for Job just as deeply as Job hurt. Yahuah knows the end from the beginning. Job will likely see all of his children again, and they will be glad thereafter for eternity. Pain is a small price to pay for eternal love, eternal peace, eternal joy.
Life is not concerned with wealth and possessions. Life is the created reality which the human soul lives within. All of us together create a world we perceive as “real“. Often we base reality on what we are told by others. Yet most souls have no understanding of what is truly valuable.
Money has no value, but we trade it for food and other things. Even silver and gold have no value. They come out of the dust of the earth and are used to trade for things of equal non-existent value. Only love has value. Love is the only path to life. Love is what opens the strait gate.
Try becoming saved by hating Yahusha. Try to become saved by merely acknowledging that Yahusha is real. Acknowledgement that He is real will never save you. Demons acknowledge that He is real. Its in your Bible. Look it up. Acknowledgement is no path to life. Only love can lead you home. All other paths lead to darkness.
In order to keep myself walking in a straight line, I generally keep to myself. My one social event is Sabbath day, when I spend time with people who mostly believe as I believe. Our fellowship is not as vibrant as it used to be. Something is not right within our fellowship, and I think it is simply the malaise and gathering gloom of despondency from the reality that we are at the end.
It’s apparent to most people, saved or not. We are being dragged by a chain around the necks of humanity into the last days. People carry on with their lives but without the former enthusiasm. We don’t look forward to better days on earth any more. We can see that famine truly is coming. We see that war might genuinely turn nuclear.
That’s not very encouraging, but Yahuah devoted the last book of the Words to that reality. He wants us to know because He cares for us. We need to know, and He is.
I started writing my book a couple of weeks ago. No writing the last four days because my 8 yr old broke his ankle, then got really sick the very next day so we had to take him to the city for a bone specialist and then again to another pediatric practice regarding the sickness.
He is fine after both treatments. Amazing kid. We went to Sabbath assembly yesterday, both of us in big walking boots for broken feet and everyone marveled at the oddity of it. I broke my foot on Sept. 29th, and he broke his on Oct. 29th. He was born May 9th, and I was born May 11th. He was going to be born May 11th but he flipped over in the womb and had to be C-sectioned in a hurry.
My (then) wife could not see the operation due to a shield they erected, but I was standing beside her and I could see over it. The two doctors were having a very difficult time getting the baby delivered, and I will always remember the surgeon struggling mightily with both hands, looking at me with genuine panic and fear. Meredith knew something was bad wrong, too, crying and calling my name and squeezing my hand.
Then there Nathan was, and Meredith was fine. Suffering, but solid.
Maybe that’s a metaphor for our own lives on this plane. Hardship, struggle and panic. Death banging on the doorway of our souls and then boom – we are at last in the Kingdom of Heaven where none of the earth will ever be. No Satan. No fear. No sadness. No hunger. No bad thing, ever, and no end to His radiance and His love.
If you go, you will be fulfilled like you cannot imagine. All of that yearning in your soul will be overflowing with completion. You will be satisfied at last.
Let these sorrows of the last days, weeks, months and years serve you as reminders that Yahuah is on His throne, that you have nothing to fear, that you are not actually alone, that someone somewhere loves you more than anyone else, anywhere. And His love is forever. He will never turn His back on you. He will never let you go, and you will never want to leave Him.
Peace to you.