I wonder how everyone is doing? Are we getting ready for the apocalypse, or are we hoping for a rapture? Will Yahuah delay His coming for another thousand years, or is His return imminent? What are you thinking? What is your family saying? How are you living your lives right now?
When I ask myself these questions, what I come back around to is one word: Love. Love is all I have left to give, and I’m giving it. Love starts at home, and although I live alone about one-half hour from my kids, I see them all every day. I spend time with their mother and we get along better than ever. She is missing the empathy gene, and apparently her early vaccinations caused a narcissistic allergic reaction, and now she is stuck on herself :), but I can hang with it. Not a problem.
When the last chapter of the book is in hand, there is no need to get all weepy over lost love because there is only time to give it.
I say “yes” more often. I let nearly everything slide, with zero expectations of any right conduct from anyone. I hope, but I do not expect. Dropping my standards to zero and being a source for peace in my broken family has us more “family” than we ever were when I had high standards and exacting expectations.
It is the willingness to lose, to let people I love go full-on stupid if stupid is their objective – and still love them – which is transforming me in this world. My transformation subsequently impacts my family and others around me. I can tell you why this works for me like it does, and why it will work for you, too.
It’s pretty simple, actually. There are no secret methods. No behavior mod, no bribes, no fear. In fact, there is no effort at all.
So what’s the process?
Letting go. Of myself.
I am not important, but my family is. I am no one, but my children are very special. My place is not to lead from the front, but to serve my family by being a pillar of peace and reliability and honesty. I exist to make sure they have access to my decades of wisdom, of my decades of relationship with Yahuah, of my decades of dealing with sorrows and loss and peace and happiness and gladness and everything else that we encounter in this world.
I am honest with them regarding any subject matter one can conceive of. I tell them the truth and over time, as they mature, they realize that yes, I really did tell them the truth. That is when they listen all the more closely.
I am not important. I exist to serve my family and that means letting go of what I think they should “look like” under my “leadership”, and embracing the “How can I strengthen my family today?”
It is relationship building. I am slowly disappearing from my family as a force to be reckoned with and becoming someone they can get the truth from, that they can get opportunity from, that they can turn to for anything and when I must say “no”, I say so with a sympathetic heart and an option of some other choice that I can say “yes” to.
I urge you to try this. Try tossing your expectations and just disappearing behind your transformation into a servant with very low need for any particularly noble conduct from those you serve. You have been wounded, for sure. You have been used and lied to and stolen from and treated very badly. Yahuah knows these things.
I tell you dear brothers and sisters, there is no time for grieving now. If you want to live a beautiful, peaceful, hopeful and very contented life now, right now, then lay down your life serving others. Serve their hearts. Encourage them and just listen to their problems. Help where you can in every interaction. Play with a light hand. Gentleness, kindness, humor, mercy. These are the superstructure of loving others.
Make sure you keep enough time for yourself. That is very important. You need time for peaceful prayer with Yahuah. He wants time with you, too.
He really is coming. We really will see Him. He really will call many of us home. Those of His people which He leaves here have specific missions to perform. Those remaining have work to do saving souls. You will be given unique abilities, and one of them is endurance. You will be capable of enduring exponentially more than you ever have had to endure in your life, and you will become stronger for it, not weaker.
You will have the courage of lions. You will face the enemy eye to eye and you will dominate. You will save souls, the souls of the children of Yahuah that He burns with desire to bring into eternal life. Your reward will be great.
I cannot say that I want to be here with you, because I ache to go home. But if He will let me stay, I will. I have asked Him to allow me to remain behind. There are souls to save, and I want to be right here with them. The last man out. I can wait. It’s worth it.
It is fearsome to fall into the hands of the living Elohim.
Heb 10:32 But remember the former days, when, after you were enlightened, you endured a great struggle with sufferings.
Heb 10:33 On the one hand you were exposed to reproaches and pressures, and on the other hand you became sharers with those who were so treated,
Heb 10:34 for you sympathized with me in my chains, and you accepted with joy the seizure of your possessions, knowing that you have a better and a lasting possession for yourselves in the heavens.
Heb 10:35 Do not, then, lose your boldness, which has great reward.
Heb 10:36 For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the desire of Yahuah, you receive the promise:
Heb 10:37 “For yet a little while – He who is coming shall come and shall not delay.”
Jerry,
I had the privilege, this past summer, to learn to agree to disagree with my ex, my daughter’s father, but move forward on what is important; working together towards the same goal of us supporting her in her farmer’s market bakery business. Yes, my job is to love, listen, and build her, her husband, and her father up, pointing them towards Father’s kingdom. I am here, to help the next generations about work and love.
Philippians 3:13 Brothers and sisters, as I said, I know I have not arrived; but there’s one thing I am doing: I’m leaving my old life behind, putting everything on the line for this mission.
~semi-retired teacher~
Robin-Ohio
That’s all we can do, Robin. Our vest efforts to love them and to live as an example. Soon enough we will be gone and may Yahuah have mercy on the lost.
You are right Sir. LOVE is all we have left to give… i struggle EVERY day with anger/loathing for and to the people on the earth with EVIL flowing through them….what they do to the children and the ones who cant fight!! Seriously, its bad, i pray for the Lord to give me patience and to be able to love even the ones i truly hate! NOT easy, thats for sure!
I so understand you, Kim. Only prayer and submission to Yahuah keeps me from taking the war to the people responsible for so much of the evil we know is happening. Yahuah will burn them for eternity, and they will scream in rage forever. We will never suffer again when we go home, Kim. Try not to hate the wicked. Turn to face Yahuah and hold on to Him.
Hi Brother, Letting go, of myself. This hit me like a ton of bricks. I’m in the best time of my life with the people I love the most, and I sometimes can’t help walking around correcting things and making sure everything is done the way I think it should be done. I think this is the Marine Drill Instructor inside me. I often say no to any request made by my two boys until I figure out a way for them to learn a lesson from the request. I often become a “narrator” in traffic, describing the misfit drivers all around me. “Look at this knucklehead, where did he learn how to drive?” While crossing the driveway crosswalk into our local H-E-B yesterday, a young lady and I were forced to stop in our tracks as a hurried driver accelerated through the crosswalk. Of course I had to say something. Before I make myself sound like a complete ogre, I should add that most people look at me as relatively civil and generally a… Read more »
Thanks, Ken. I very much appreciate your comments. I know where you are coming from, because I frequently saw myself becoming a “grumpy old man”, always tuning and fine tuning and seeing what could have been instead of what simply “was”. We are at the time in our age where we can let our children breathe. You and I were doing business the same way, saying “no” until we found the teaching point, “correcting things” until we found the maximum efficiency and the like. Part of that is age. We are indeed aging and sometimes I feel almost a desperation to polish things up. That seems to be an innate desire to perfect myself before my heart stops beating forever. Letting go and allowing others their space to learn from their mistakes takes a lot of pressure off us, and subsequently off of those we love. And Ken, time for yourself is more important than you realize. Schedule gym time or motorcycle time. Put it on your calendar and schedule those popups to remind you… Read more »
Thanks Jerry, it is such a hard time to live through right now. I am wondering what I should be doing to help others in my life. I am also just trying to be here for them, even if we disagree. Letting go of our own judgements of others or our feelings of betrayal are hard to do, but we must. Forgiveness is freeing and what we are commanded to do.
Sorry about the betrayal, April. But honey, don’t we all get burned in life? And if you asked or took a survey, would anyone believe that you betrayed them? And what if you never betrayed anyone and what if those who betrayed you finally realized the full magnitude of their betrayal? Would you feel self-righteous upon receiving their admission of guilt? I would, and that’s part of my attitude adjustment. Giving others the latitude to make as many mistakes as I myself make is very healthy. Expecting error from others, or at least being willing to fully accommodate their error, is a major pathway to serenity. Seriously April, don’t lose any more of your lifetime dredging up pain or sorrow or any other bad emotion caused by the error of others. No more time for that stuff. You be a forgiving, tolerant and lovely woman and you will be a blessing for everyone you meet.